Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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