He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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