you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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