I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I have already put on my inside pants.
Randomize
