Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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