I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize