Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
