i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
