it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
