I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
