Sry I called you an 8
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
50% drunk capacity currently
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Oh god it's open bar.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
