a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
You're breaking my sexual little heart
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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