why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize