Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
