yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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