I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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