how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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