Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
