Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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