I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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