Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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