Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
