I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
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