He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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