i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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