I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Randomize
