we made out on top of his cat.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
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