My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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