the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
