: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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