My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
