Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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