yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
