Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
