May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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