Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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