Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
