Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
