I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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