Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
