I will die if light touches me.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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