fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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