Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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