I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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