i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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