I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You made out with two different species that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
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