DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
