Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize