? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
