dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
