in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize