She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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