office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
