He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
